Are you happy?

Are you happy? 

Not just right now, while you’re reading this insight, but in general?

It doesn’t mean you’re always happy, but is there a sense of contentment inside of you with the way you’re living your life?

Before you start thinking about whether my state of happiness is this insight’s purpose, I want to let you know that I’m happy.

Not always, not every day, but generally spoken yes. 

I’m content with how things are going, and occasionally that contentment translates into a state of happiness.

How about you?

Are you happy? And do you know why? Or why not?

When you think about it, and I’m not a student of happiness, it’s clear that happiness is a fundamental human desire.

I don’t think anybody is waking up in the morning thinking:

“Today, I’m going to be unhappy.”

We want to spend our days being happy, don’t we?

But do we know how to be happy?
Do we know the fundamentals behind happiness?

I spent thousands of hours being educated in math, languages, economics, and other stuff, but nobody ever taught me how to be happy.

How many classes have you had on happiness?

How many classes have you had on dealing with sadness, or finding a deeper level of peace or contentment in your life?

You may have studied psychology for a bit, but I didn’t. I wish I had spent more time studying psychology, but that’s about books, theory, lessons, professors, etc.

Each kid should be taught what it means to be happy and what can be done to increase happiness.

One of the top five regrets of people dying, as researched by a palliative nurse, is the wish to have allowed yourself to be happier.

Here’s the complete list of regrets from the website:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.
3. I wish I had the courage to express my feelings.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

How many boxes do you tick already now?

Happiness to me is having a clear vision of what you want from your life.

That means living a life where you’re true to yourself and allow yourself to be happy. Those are the two main components.

Regarding working hard, it’s a matter of doing the work you love. Then working hard (in moderation) will provide energy instead of sucking it out of you.

Not expressing your feelings is something I find difficult to relate to. 

I have no problem expressing my feelings, and I find it hard to completely understand why people find it hard.

Yes, there’s a time and a place when to do it, but keeping it all inside only makes one person unhappy. You!

When you’re uncomfortable expressing your feelings, you’re probably not living a life true to yourself. Those two correlate in my mind.

Staying in touch with friends is a choice. I have a select group of friends who live all over the place. 

We don’t speak all the time, but we do connect. And when we see each other, it’s like we just said goodbye from the last time we met. There are no expectations or grudges there regarding connecting.

And yes, it can always be more.

As a matter of fact, when I conclude writing this draft, I will call a friend whom I didn’t talk to in a while.

Overall, I’m content, at moments happy, and I don’t tick any of the boxes. But, hopefully, knock on wood; there’s still a long way to go.

Your turn: Are you happy?

Do more of what makes you happy!

Erikjan