Choices Leading Self Mindset Ownership Purpose


You have one life. Live it. Own your choices and decisions. Enjoy when things work out. Don’t complain when they don’t. Fix it.

My god, it’s getting worse every year. 

And writing this email to you is adding to the problem, I’m fully aware. 

The start of a new year is THE natural moment to bring closure to what has been and start working on what will be.

Let’s face it; when you use a paper journal that leverages a calendar, you probably enjoy a fresh new bundle of paper. 

I know I always do for the first few days.

January first means a fresh new start. In many different ways.

So, it’s not a surprise that my inbox was bombarded over the past two weeks with all kinds of offers for programs to bring some improvement to my life.

“Try fasting; it’s better than dieting.”

“Master your mindset roadmap.”

“Start the year with a bang.”

“Share your meditation program with those you love.”

“This is the year you will write your bestseller.”

While these taglines above are not identical to the emails I received, it’s a pretty accurate reflection of what I have seen in my inbox lately.

It also accurately represents the cookies and algorithms I’ve invited into my life.

I limit cookies by making my personal choices, but sometimes they make it so hard that I’m not sure what I agreed to.

In any case, I’ve given up the slightest illusion that I have complete control over my online presence.

That last sentence is a good bridge to the point I’m trying to make in this third insight of the year.

If I don’t want those emails and cookies, I can make an effort to delete them.

If I’m truly serious about it, I could wipe my laptop, change email addresses, and do everything I can to start over with a clean electronic slate.

I can because I have ownership over it.

So that you know, doing that is my choice. 

Not doing so is also my choice. 

Whatever I choose, it’s my decision, so I should not complain if the consequence of my choice is different from what I was looking for.

I own my decisions. And I own the consequences of my decisions.

I accept that some cookies and algorithms are trying to take advantage of me because the truth is that I also benefit from them.

I know Whatsapp is owned by Meta and leveraging my online behavior in various ways. Still, the truth is that I enjoy the convenience of the medium to communicate with friends and relatives.

I benefit probably more than I could ever imagine.

Dangerous? Maybe. 

Scary? Probably. 

Convenient? Sure.

It’s still my choice.

I’m the director of my life.

I make conscious choices about what I read or not, what I engage with, and what I’m curious about.

I unsubscribe when I don’t like something. And I complain when that unsubscribing is not easy to do.

Everything that’s coming at us in whatever way around the holidays is testing us.

Testing us how firm the ownership is over our own lives.

You decide which direction you’re going.

When you leave the gym for what it is after three visits and become a fitness tourist, it’s your decision.

When your boss starts yelling at you again after three weeks of good intentions, it’s your choice to stay or walk away.

When your screen time is out of control, you can limit it and stay away from your phone.

When your future keeps you awake at night, either accept you’re not sleeping or do something about it.

So don’t complain when you stay fat, are unhappy at work, are addicted to social media, or not sleeping at night.

Those are your choices. 

It’s your life, and you own it: nobody else but you.

Erikjan Lantink

Life is all about ownership. 

Your life is all about ownership. So is mine.

Your turn: Own or Complain?

Do more of what makes you happy!


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Erikjan Lantink
Business & Leadership Coach

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